Arsenal: Amputation the only cure to this fast-spreading disease

Arsenal have a disease, and while modern medicine is often preferred, a clean amputation—perhaps several—is the best way to clean out the problem.

Okay, so let’s face facts. Optimism is fun, and I will always be here if you need me to cast a happy light on a dreary Arsenal. But no matter how I try to convince myself that patience and therapy are the right way to heal the body of this club, the simple truth is that we’ve been trying that approach for years.

It’s time to get out the butcher knives and start chopping away all the festering wounds that won’t let us heal.

Many would see the Unai Emery wound as the first in need of immediate removal, and for the sake of this argument, I won’t disagree. Though I would advice against getting chop-happy and blaming the many individual flaws of the club on one man. Yes, he is responsible for a large portion, but I wonder if we didn’t cut away some of the the contributing wounds, if the Emery wound wouldn’t heal.

For now though, chop him off. One and done, a clean cut. Time to try something else. And while we can’t sell any players right now, there are some that I would rather see amputated from the first team.

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Can anyone guess where I’ll start? Sokratis. The first chop. While it’s still sparkly clean. Cut him off. No more.

Mesut Ozil is second. Maybe he wasn’t the worst performer, but he’s not right for the club, and for the same reasons that Granit Xhaka should be cut off, Ozil should too. Send him somewhere he can be used properly.

Those are some festery wounds to start with, and there are some I’ve got my eye on from there. David Luiz, for instance. I’d rather flounder with Calum Chambers and Rob Holding than continue hoping that Luiz can sort this out.

Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang? Further off, but a wound I’m leering at. Anyone not helping the club move forward should be considered a wound, and Aubameyang isn’t clearly on one side or the other.

I’m sounding like a butcher, but after the result at home against Southampton, I’m allowed to.

Start with the obvious ones with eyes on the less so too. You have to be ruthless if you want to stop the bleeding or the whole body will turn into a puddle of moldy goop.