Arsenal are ravaged by injuries and blunted in attack because of Mikel Arteta's rotation policies, recruitment strategies and tactical decisions, but luck is still on the Process King's side.
The luck of Arteta can better be described as the cult of Arteta. An army of fans, bloggers, media pundits and starstruck scribes who are unwavering in their faith in Arteta's apparently revolutionary managerial acumen.
If some Arsenal fans think we've been here before, they could be remembering of all those years of "In Arsene We Trust." Annual calls to continue supporting a legendary gaffer feeling the financial pinch of Emirates Stadium costs while trying to compete with Roman Abramovich's Chelsea and a Manchester United spending policy that went from lavish to obscene with the stroke of a pen.
The difference is Wenger had earned some support on account. Earned it by winning a pair of doubles and building 'The Invincibles.'
Arteta has no such history. Okay, so he won an FA Cup as an interim boss, albeit with players mostly recruited by Wenger and Unai Emery. Big whoop. If you promise to do your homework early, I'll tell you a wee fable about the time Roberto Di Matteo won an FA Cup and the UEFA Champions League as an interim.
No track record, but a seemingly endless supply of goodwill and assurance his project will come good. Just give it enough time. How much time? Nobody knows.
The cult of Arteta has no timeline
Is the Arteta plan a five-year plan? Six? Seven? Doesn't seem to matter. If he wins, no matter when, victory is proof of Arteta's generational talents.
What happens if Arsenal lose? The project just needs more time, ye of little faith. Time enough to enter another phase. How many phases will it take, you ask? Don't ask me. Don't ask Arteta, either.
Arteta doesn't work on any timeline. That's why he's taking an age to sign another striker, winger or creative midfielder.
All three were needed after last season's near miss in the Premier League. Yet Arteta stood still, content instead to sign one more left-back and a midfielder whose strength is aerial duels.
Arteta didn't rush the obvious need for attacking reinforcements. Why would he when he has all the time in the world?
Time enough to sign another defensive midfielder. Just what an attack-shy team needs!
Arteta's defensive leanings undermining Arsenal
The Arsenal side Arteta inherited in late-2019 was lopsided from years of front-loading in the transfer market. Wenger's almost fanatical fidelity to the purities of flair in forward areas meant the Gunners were effective in the final third, but a mess at the back.
To his credit, Arteta eventually solidified the back line, but he did it via negative tactics and a transfer policy just as lopsided as what came before. The only difference is while Wenger rarely saw a No. 10 or wide forward he didn't want to sign, Arteta has never seen a defensive midfielder or inverted full-back he doesn't quickly fit for an Arsenal shirt.
Consider the next big incoming, Real Sociedad's Martin Zubimendi. He won't arrive until the summer, but Arteta is the driving force behind the deal, according to Fabrizio Romano.
Two things stick out about this transfer. One, Arteta is getting a sixth full season in charge, regardless of what happens or doesn't happen during the rest of this campaign. Yet more time for the "project" to finally go bang.
More time and more money. Zubimendi's release clause is a cheeky €60m. That's just pocket change to a manager who dropped a fortune to sign Thomas Partey, Declan Rice and Jorginho (approximately £150m). Three defensive midfielders, but Arsenal need another with contracts expiring.
What the Gunners need more is a creative technician with the vision and intelligence to manufacture chances and score goals. Somebody who could support Martin Odegaard or at least offer the isolated, overworked skipper a breather.
Arteta is doubling down on defensive midfield because defensive is his default setting. It's ironic given his playing days as an artful midfielder who was a project of Barcelona's famed and progressive youth academy, as well as his time on Pep Guardiola's coaching staff.
There's been no such adherence to Total Football from Arteta the manager. He's leaned into densely populated defensive structures in times of trouble. Think back to that FA Cup win when Arsenal played five at the back, went long and relied on Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang to work his magic in front of goal.
It was all very George Graham, but that's Arteta. Only not as successful. Don't hold your breath waiting for that ruthless striker or the dynamic winger to reduce the workload for Bukayo Saka.
The Arteta workload has already laid Saka low. It's the underlying cause of the current injury crisis.
Lack of rotation continues to haunt Arteta
If you play fantasy football, you love Arteta more than any hipster blogger or social-media tactician ever could. The man finds a starting XI he likes and rarely deviates.
Since the word 'toxic' can today be applied to any phrase to make it negative, Arteta has toxic loyalty to his lineup of choice. Consider his selections for Arsenal's recent dismal two-hander in the domestic cup competitions.
He could've rested William Saliba or Gabriel Magalhaes in favour of Jakub Kiwior. Oleksandr Zinchenko could have stepped in for Myles Lewis-Skelly. Raheem Sterling might have started on the flanks.
None of those things happened and a weary squad was pushed around physically by Newcastle and Manchester United in less than a week. Rotating provides a team with fresh impetus, keeps the competitive levels high within the squad and helps develop contingency plans for future deficiencies.
Arteta can't or won't see those benefits. Nor has he seen the danger of overplaying younger players. Dangers summed up by Saka's hamstring woes keeping him out for multiple months.
Running younger talents into the ground has always been a risk. Those who break down early often don't make it all the way back as good as they once were. Just ask Michael Owen.
Arteta picked Saka over and over, never risking a game without him. Rarely substituting him early, even if Arsenal held a commanding lead.
That intransigence cost Saka, but he's not the only one kept in the firing line for too long. There's also Ben White, while Gabriel Jesus is now done for the season.
Arteta and his legions of loyalists can point to bad luck, but the reality is fortune still favours the Arsenal manager, in spite of himself.
The luck of Arteta is real
Believe it or not, but Arsenal can still win the league. Correction. Arsenal should still win the league. Not because of any next-level brilliance from Arteta, although certain bloggers probably have posts titled with variations on the 'Galaxy Brain' theme ready to publish.
Instead, Arteta's team can secure the trophy simply by being the last least-incompetent group left standing. Liverpool have started to drop points, amid Mohamed Salah's bitching about the future. A future made murky by an expiring contract triple whammy, involving Salah, Virgil van Dijk and Trent Alexander-Arnold, Liverpool somehow allowed to fester.
Manchester City have already done their damndest to leave the league crown up for grabs. There are signs the Citizens are finding their scoring touch again, but the defence is still leaking more goals than a late-Wenger era back four skippered by Ange Postecoglou.
Arteta only needs to engineer a winning sequence during an upcoming run of four home games out of the next six, and Arsenal can ease into control of this title race. If that happens, Arteta will be proof if you wait long enough, and there's nobody around to check you, time will forgive and even reward your many, many mistakes.